Hello~ I`m a tiered girl. I’ll tell you why;
First, I do my homework or study and then go to bed around two o'clock .But you know what?? I need to go to bed earlier, so I could grow. Anyway, I get up at seven past five by my cell phone. It has an alarm function. Getting up is so hard. So the alarm makes me annoying. Then I wash my hair, teeth, face and what ever.,,.,. Then the time is seven past thirty. I get dressed. I wear my school uniform. I hate it....... I have breakfast at seven past forty. I go to school around eight O`clock. I arrive at fifteen minutes later. I like lunch time the best!!. I go to home at four O’clock. I take a break and go to academy before five thirty. They give us only five minute to rest...I go home at five to ten.
This is my busy day.
My Ideal School
In my ideal school, it would be so famous, that the first come students are first served. Only thousand of students are allowed. I would be a lucky girl. In my ideal school, we would be only studying for one hour. That’s good! We would have fun with the nature. The beach, the forest and the mountains...
Through the nature, we can learn about science. My favorite part would be playing in the water and walking in the forest smelling the fresh air (but I hate meeting slugs).
For skin, we’ll always need sun-ream every were we go.
2 comments:
Freedom! I hear ya! It must be so hard!
You did the same as your brother. :) You start every sentence with "I". To make it a little more interesting, try adding transition words.
For example, "First, I get up at around seven o'clock. Then, I have breakfast at around ten before eight." (Next..., After that..., Finally...)
Also, can you add some more details? For example, what do you eat for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. What is your favorite subject at school? What is your favorite time of the day?
Here is an example:
Please write more details. Here is an example:
Hi! My name is Sarah, and I'm an American high school student. I go to school every day from Monday to Friday. I wake up in the morning at 6:30. My mom doesn't make me breakfast, because she is too busy, so I usually make it myself. I always eat cereal or toast. But sometimes, I don't have any breakfast at all because I wake up too late.
When I wake up, I take a shower, then I dry my hair and get dressed. When it's cold, I wear jeans and a sweater. When it's warm, I can wear a t-shirt, but, no shorts are allowed!
At 7:00, I drive to school. School starts at 7:30, but I get to school at 7:10 so I can say 'hello' to my friends. My favorite subject is music. I am in the school choir. Our choir sometimes sings in competitions and we travel to different schools.
At 2:30, school is finished for the day. So, I go to my after school job. I work at a supermarket as a cashier. I work from 3:00 until 7pm. It's a fun job, and I like talking to the people. Working is probably my favorite part of the day. It is fun because there is no stress, it is just easy.
At 7:30 I come home and eat dinner with my family. Then, I watch TV for a little bit, before I start my homework.
At 9:30, I usually finish my homework. So, I can chat online or play video games.
I go to sleep at 12:00am on most nights.
That is my day! I hope you enjoyed reading it!
Wow! You did really well. It is so natural and I almost can see you talking!
Good use of transitions "first, anyway, and then".
Also, I like your questions, "But you know what?"
Your first sentence is great! "Hello~I'm a tired girl. I'll tell you why:"
However,
"seven past five" is 5:07 and "seven past thirty" is 30:07
Instead, write, "five after seven"(7:05) and "half past seven" (7:30)
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